Why I Teach Option:
About fifteen years ago I sat in a therapist’s office bitterly complaining about the people in my life that were failing to meet my “reasonable” expectations. My children weren’t behaving the way I wanted them to. My husband wasn’t loving me the way I thought he should. I wasn’t excited about the career I had so desired. And the list went on. After enumerating all my logical reasons why it was so difficult for me to feel good, my friendly therapist Steve, smiled and comfortably inquired: “Melissa, if you could be happy, would you?" The question seemed ludicrous, (I think I even chuckled hearing it!), but simultaneously compelling. Would I be happy? My mind raced.  The question implied I had a choice in the matter. I was stunned. 

Never before had it dawned on me that I might actually be in charge of my emotions. I just thought that people and events were the cause of my unhappiness. It sure felt that way, and I had all the evidence to prove it! I approached life with the need to control so I could feel good. If I could get life to unfold the way I wanted, then of course I’d be happy. But I was never satisfied. I was never happy on a permanent basis because there was always some other challenging situation or person just around the corner.

That incredible, life-altering question asked so many years ago opened the door for me
to discover an empowering philosophy called the Option Method which explained how my unhappiness came about. It stated that my beliefs caused my feelings and behaviors, not outside circumstances or people’s behaviors as I had thought. This paradigm-shift allowed me to stop blaming others for my unhappiness and take control of my emotional life. I felt relieved, yet empowered because there was something I could do to help myself. I could change a belief. And change I did. 

When I became unhappy I started using the Option Method to investigate my beliefs. I began to understand the real reasons I was so angry, dissatisfied, and hurt. By being genuinely curious, honest, and kind with myself I was able to let go of beliefs that were causing me unhappiness, beliefs I wasn’t even aware I had!  No more trying to control others or fixing what was wrong with me as a way to feel better.  I was actually feeling good in the same old life I had previously felt so bad in. 

As I continued to use Option in my life I encountered surprising benefits in addition to feeling good. I discovered a more powerful me, not from a position of being justifiably right and unhappy, but from being non-judgmental and happy. When problems arose I was clearer, more creative and effective in finding solutions. Becoming responsible for my emotions, allowed me to create more loving, trusting relationships with family and friends. I learned how to let go of my unattainable standard of perfection so I could be kinder and easier with myself and others.  And, to this day I continue to change. 

The beauty of the Option Method and its philosophy is that any one can use it to feel happier. It doesn’t require a special education or advanced training or a third party to do “the work." You can learn this amazing tool and reap the benefits. I once heard someone express her gratitude for Option when she said: “If I hadn’t discovered Option I would have missed my life.”  How profound and how true. I would have missed my life, too. But, I didn’t. I teach Option so you, too, can discover the wonder and beauty of being happy in your life.
 

 

  
   
 

Melissa Black Ford
Option Method Teacher and Practitioner          

Experience:
Melissa brings over 14 years of experience as an Option Method Teacher and Practitioner to her work with individuals and groups teaching empowering perspectives and easy-to-use strategies for creating happier lives. She works with a wide-range of clients dealing with life issues from parenting challenges, job/career concerns, relationship issues, as well as self-confidence/self-esteem obstacles. Melissa’s qualifications include 10 years as a business owner, 19 years on-the-job training as a parent, and a sincere interest and passion for helping people learn how to access their own answers and solutions to their personal challenges. She also is a member of the Option Method Network and holds a B.S. from the University of Illinois and a J.D. from DePaul University – College of Law.

Benefits of Working with Me:
I believe everyone, including you, has the power to create a happier life no matter how long you may have struggled with unhappiness. Learning how to be happy requires desire, persistence, patience and kindness. I bring these qualities plus an accepting, loving attitude when I work with you. As a result, you’ll be more comfortable, find it easier, and have more fun as you explore, question and change the limiting beliefs you hold that create your discomfort. You’ll learn how self-acceptance and personal kindness frees you to create positive changes and truly become your own best expert. Because Option Method is a self-help, self-discovery tool for happiness, it will become your personal tool that you can use any time, any place to help you feel good again.

What Option Method and Option Method Practitioners Are Not:
The Option Method is not psychotherapy and Option Method Practitioners are not psychologists, psychotherapists, social workers or any other licensed mental health professionals.  As an Option Method professional I don’t diagnose or treat mental illnesses, diseases, or disorders. If you feel the need to seek care from a licensed professional, I encouraged you to contact your local agencies/associations which will provide you with information regarding this type of assistance.

Click Here For Testimonials